Wednesday, August 13, 2014

On Being (Almost) Twenty

Next week, I will be 20 years old. I know that it is still young, but I have to admit, I really can’t believe I will be entering my 20’s. I mean, the last time I thought about what I would do with a decade, I was turning 10. And I can tell you that your 10’s are full of awkward haircuts, puberty, training bras, braces, first kisses that we can never forget (I told the first guy I kissed, “that is so easy!! And not so bad!” why, oh, why did I do that), 10’s are filled with middle school, high school, finding yourself, and then there are 2 mere years where you feel invincible: 18 and 19, and then suddenly you are sitting at your desk writing about what it feels like to enter your 20’s.

Because I think ahead, I keep telling myself, in ten years time, I will be 30. Which I know is infinitely cool, because Jennifer Gardner taught me to believe so. I think every girl who watched 13 Going On 30 knows that the best years are going to be thirty, flirty and thriving. But the point of this post is that I know these next ten years will be filled with new, beautiful adventures. I know there will be new opportunities, love, heartbreak, wonder, and discovery. I know I traded in a set of ten years, to get to this point, and I am so excited.

I was thinking about how every year that we get older, we get to figure out a little bit more of who we are. But we also get to reflect on a whole year of life. Here’s what 19 has been filled with, by the numbers.

13: The number of inches I cut off of my hair.

7: The amount of writing journals I bought  (for all of 19’s adventures of course).

4: Trips I’ve taken, twice to Laguna Beach (I am addicted to this sweet getaway spot), New York, and Bali, Indonesia.

5: The number of IPhones I’ve gone through. They are either defective, or I just happen to drop them in things like lentil soup.

11: The number of kids I’ve gotten to babysit for, the number of little loves that keep me curious and laughing.

2: Semesters of school I have finished.

1: The single internship I had, that turned into a dream job at the Las Vegas Sun.

7: The number of month’s I have had this wonderful, uplifting blog that keeps my love for writing on fire.

1: Lease I signed to share an apartment with my sister. Which has been the greatest, silliest, best adventure yet.

478: Or something like that, but the number of phone calls I have made to my mom, just to hear her voice, her words of encouragement, and her jokes that may never be all that funny, but her charming laugh keeps me laughing with her.

20: The number of Bikram Yoga classes I made it through.

4: The number of times I’ve gone to get photos developed.

2: The number of runs that have ended in a rainstorm.

Every time: The number of times my “runs” have turned into what I so cleverly renamed, wogs. Walk/Jogs where I just look miserable.

6: The number of times I’ve locked myself out of my car. Thank you, AAA.

365: Cups of coffee I’ve had, and it’s probably even more, but you can bet that each morning I have my fix. Every. Single. Morning.

14: The number of books I’ve received as presents.

2: Weeks in Bali, Indonesia that forever shaped a bit of my heart.

Infinite: the amount of love and support I have felt this year. The number of times I have smiled, laughed, and completely lost myself in the power of good company. Infinite, the amount of love and gratitude I have for all of my readers, seriously, you guys keep me going. The number of times I have cried tears of absolute utter joy because of all my constant blessings.

Infinite, the number of times this year I have had to physically stop, and just take a moment to realize that this life, my life, is so overwhelmingly good. Life is this. It’s the memories, the people, the times we stop just to thank whatever it is we believe in. 19, you were pretty wonderful.

My wish for my 20’s is to take it all in, capture the moments with my heart instead of a camera, spend more time being present. Say hello to more strangers. Travel to more places. Love a bit more deeply. Love myself fearlessly. Take chances. Be brave. Stay true to myself. Go after every single dream that girl in her 10’s wanted. Remind myself that each day, each step in these twenties is a gift.


Happy Wednesday xoxox
Stop by Anne's blog, Love the Here and Now, to share what you are wishing for.


  1. You are such a beautiful person and such an old soul. I love it, I can't believe you're only 20, you seem wise beyond your years. :) Happy almost birthday! When is the actual day? :)

    1. Thank you so much, Tawnya. The actually day is August 24th. (:

  2. Happy early birthday! I remember feeling weird about turning 20 because it would mean I would never be a teen again. But to be honest, the 20s have been the best years of my life so far! And yes, each day is a gift. One of my favorite quotes goes something like this, "Be thankful for getting old. It is a pleasure that many people don't get."

    1. Thank you, Blake! That quote is so great, something I will definitely remember.

  3. I love your deep appreciation and gratitude for everything in your life. It is refreshing and beautiful! Really though? An phone in your lentil soup?!

    1. Thank you, Anne! SO thankful for you and Wednesday Wishes. Yes, talking on my phone, making lentil soup, haha, you know how it ends. Lol!

  4. Amazing wisdom far beyond your years... I don't know if I ever commented before that I couldn't believe your age when I found out a few weeks ago--not because you look older, haha!, but because of the amazing depth of your posts. I wish I'd been at 19 where you are now! I feel like you're about 10 years ahead of me on the maturity scale, and I'm several years older than you. ;) Love this post, as always. :)

  5. Thank you, Kacie! You always say the nicest things. I used to think it was a bad thing to be an "old soul" but I think I am finally growing into it. (: And I am glad I don't look 10 years older, haha!

  6. :) Awesome, awesome post. I love that your mom tells jokes- some of which aren't all that funny... mine is the same and I laugh anyway because it makes HER funny.


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